From the window of my apartment I see the Jerusalem skyline... if I lean out of the window on a funny angle, slightly risking falling out, but the sunsets are worth it. I have moved to Baka, a nice little anglo/israel/frenchi neighbourhood nearer east Jerusalem. I didn't give much thought to post-merkaz klita life as I could never imagine what "real" Israeli living would be like. After just 3 weeks, I have a small taste of just how hard it is. Nobody earns real money - by that i mean, money that makes you feel secure. An amount per month/year that doesn't make you worry. People watch their pennies here. It's not the best way to be living, but the majority are in the same boat and so it seems normal. It has become normal to me. I actually told somebody that 25 shekel/hour is a great wage. Well it is, for Jerusalem... They/I take jobs with low wages, with salaries that cannot possibly compare to what friends in the us and uk are earning - it's laughable. But people continue and live their lives and I am just starting out. I sometimes wonder to myself when I will become employable, when I will be doing the kind of job I could be doing in London right now. Until my Hebrew is much improved and I have a second degree, is the realistic answer. For now, I too will scrimp and save and watch my few pennies and try and focus on living and being here.
Luckily, the last 4 months have not been all about money or lack of, rather I was so focused on friends and relationships and my absorption into Israel that I didn't dwell on what was coming - the end of Ulpan! It ended and it was sad. Not as sad as I had imagined, mainly because I was secure that I knew where all my good friends were going, that we weren't abandoning yet another "family" and set of friends. We're all still in this together. It's true that I can't just pop over to Tel Aviv on a whim and visit my bestest pals who have moved there. It's also true that it's only 45 minutes away and I really can. It's just a shame the sherut is so bumpy and you have to sit so CLOSE to random, religious men who I often think enjoy the bumpiness for that very reason...

Relationships have deepened, over these few months. I rely on my good friends, we call each other to say nothing at all, just to check they're still there, still going through the same things. Setting up a flat has been unsettling, but finally I have roots - somewhere to unpack my books and call 'home'. Now back to England for a month, which will be strange and possibly even more unsettling. Will it be hard to come back here, after all that time? Will people have forgotten me? I leave in the middle of a time when one special relationship seems to be changing, but I cannot be sure. Will he forget me also? Out of sight, out of mind? There's no way to foresee, I put my trust in Him and hope for the best.